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[Towertalk] Wun-Derr Antenna

To: <towertalk@contesting.com>
Subject: [Towertalk] Wun-Derr Antenna
From: k4oj@tampabay.rr.com (Jim White, K4OJ)
Date: Wed, 17 Jul 2002 01:27:31 -0400
is this from Dr Bafoofnik?


----- Original Message -----
From: "tttt ccccc" <k3hx@juno.com>
To: <towertalk@contesting.com>
Cc: <gmisic@medrad.com>
Sent: Tuesday, July 16, 2002 11:54 PM
Subject: [Towertalk] Wun-Derr Antenna


> PRESS RELEASE FOR IMMEDIATE PUBLICATION
>
> ANNOUNCING: THE WUN-DERR ANTENNA SYSTEM
>
> Wang-Chung Wun, Phd and Herr Professor Doktor Phlim-Fflamm Derr are
> pleased to
>
> announce a revolution in amateur radio antennae:
>
> The
> "Super-Thunder-Blaster-Magnum-Turbo-Custom-Deluxe-Mini-Magnum-Premium-
>
> Pro-Limited-Elite-Platnium-Titanium-Ultra-Extreme XL-5" Amateur Radio
> Antenna.
>
> Features:
>
> Covers DC thru infrared with a maximum SWR of 1.1 per computer model
>
> Only 3.1416....meters tall.  (sounds irrational but it is not)
>
> Can be mounted vertically, horizontally or underground without affecting
>
> performance.  Ideal for locations with restrictive zoning.
>
> Handles maximum leagal power on all bands.
>
> "Contestor" option available on special order handles up to 35 MW
> (requires
>
> 3 meter cyrogenic hardline system, sold separately)
>
> No ground or radials required due to exclusive "Kirk" feed system used
>
> under license from Kobiashi-Maru Industries, LTD.
>
> Approved for use by members of the Ohm-Borg Resistance is Futile
> Movement.
>
> Contains no Oh-Zone depleting chemicals.
>
> Antenna completely biodegradable, not made from rain forest woods.
>
> Digital compatible.
>
>
> Furthermore, the Wun-Derr antenna is unconditionally warranted to
> withstand
>
> a direct hit by a low-yield thermonuclear device.  If the antenna fails
> to perform
>
> afterwards, your full purchase price, including shipping will be
> cheerfully
>
> refunded.
>
> Development:
>
> The Wun-Derr antenna is a result of pioneering work by Dr. A. Lee Hahn
> done
>
> at the Groom Lake Institute.  By combining Element 118, polywater and
> cold
>
> fusion, Dr. Hahn discovered what he dubbed "F ractal R egeneration A
> ntenna
>
> U ltra D irectivity."  Following his untimely death as the consequence of
> a
>
> neuralizer malfunction, Dr. Hahn's work was continued by Professor Derr
> at
>
> El Universidad de los Bobos in Ciudad de Guano del Toro, Banana Republic.
>
> Herr Docktor professor holds the Barnum chair in Improbable Physics at
>
> El Universidad de los Bobos.  He was joined by the esteemed Dr. Wun,
>
> a graduate of the elite Death to Running Yellow Dogs of Capitalism
> University
>
> in Yu-noh Province,  China.  Following a sabbatical at the Glorious
> People's
>
> Revolutionary Gang of Four Re-education Camp #116, he went on to gain a
>
> Phd  in Advanced Pseudo-Scientific Obsfucation at the noted Smash the
>
> Bloated Plutocrats of Imperalism Technical Institute.
>
> Together, this team discovered a method of combining wide bandwidth,
>
> extremely high Q (exact figure classified but well in excess of 143,000)
> and
>
> a new super-duper conductor......Zerohmium (tm) which was necessary
>
> to confine the wave pattern regeneration restrictor.
>
> Theory of operation:
>
> The incoming electromagnetic wave is separated into polar and sub-polar
>
> segments by a patented "synchro-spastic inverse phase disgronificator."
>
> The polar segments are then directed to a "Purple-Hayes" uncontrolled
> field
>
> beam hexer where they are mixed at high pressure with anti-gravitons.
> The
>
> sub-polar segments are held for @ 3.97642 femtoseconds in a neural-node
>
> reflux path chamber before being allowed to migrate through a
> non-metallic
>
> nanotube gate array matrix to the plate of a cyclotronic accelerator.
> The short
>
> delay permits the formation of a micro wormhole within the space-time of
> the
>
> reflux chamber.  The resultant is combined in a Jeffries Tube plasma
> condiut
>
> reactor and reformed as bagel dough.  This produce is then heated to 5.6
> tera
>
> degrees K where it again becomes electromagnetic energy and passes
> through
>
> an entropy compensator.  After compensation, it is directed through a
> main
>
> sequence carbon>argon>lithium>obscurium transformation and energy gain.
>
> Appropriate torus magnetic (erstaz-Tokomak) containment fields are
> provided
>
> to control anti-lepton barometric radiation.  (FDA, NRC approval pending)
>
> Charmed and strange quark crackers provide up-down polarity
> reconstruction
>
> while mu-psion matrices in a kryptonite refracting concentrator convert
> the
>
> remaining cyclomatic prongazoids into left-right polarity.  Pre and post
> dinural
>
> eludium-236 magnetic amplifiers are responsible for aft-fore polarity
> stability.
>
> Gain over an isotropic source computer modeled at .0017 dB.
>
>
> This produce endorsed by Dr. Timothy Leery who states:
>
> "I understand completely the operation of this device.
>
> I am the walrus, I am the eggman;  pardon me while I
>
> kiss the sky."
>
> Delivery expected during the fifth quarter of 2007.
>
> MSRP $487,895.95 FOB  Alexstranya, Leutonian People's Republic
>
> ________________________________________________________________
> GET INTERNET ACCESS FROM JUNO!
> Juno offers FREE or PREMIUM Internet access for less!
> Join Juno today!  For your FREE software, visit:
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> _______________________________________________
> Self Supporting Towers, Wireless Weather Stations, see web site:
http://www.mscomputer.com
> Call 888-333-9041 to place your order, mention you saw this ad and take an
additional 5 percent off
> any weather station price.
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