Almost exactly 11 years ago there was a posting on this reflector that summed
up a few of the threads present at that time. At first I thought that there
might be an 11 year sunspot-related cycle impacting CQ-Contest topics, but
closer inspection of the archives reveals resonably continuous discussion of
the same topics.
I wish K5ZD the same success regarding his suggestion to ease his transition
into senior citizenship that the guy who made the 11-year old posting got to
his point 4.
73,
Dick Norton, N6AA
______________________
Date: Wed Mar 17 22:13:40 1993
To: American Good Golfing League (AGGL)
Subject: Little Billy, 9 Holes, and World Peace
Over the last number of years, I have learned to play a somewhat
respectable game of golf. I have become interested in the US Open,
which appears to be the most prestigious national golfing event.
The US Open is an enjoyable event but has one major flaw. That is,
over the few years I've been following it, essentially the same
guys keep winning. I think the contest would be more interesting
if the rules were changed so that more people would have a chance
of winning. I realize that I could now win smaller local events,
but I would also like the prestige that would come from winning the
US Open. Presently I lack some combination of skill, strength,
endurance, equipment, and dedication to do so under the current
rules. Therefore I would like the rules changed so that I can win
or come closer with the effort I am currently capable of producing.
1) First, the length of the fairways on many of the holes is
longer than I can hit. I have only one driver, plus I have a
small golf club bag that does not have space for more, and do
not feel that those who are stronger or who have spent more
money on equipment should be rewarded. I find that I can hit
the ball about 200 yards. Therefore please reduce the length
of the fairway to 200 yards on all holes.
2) Second, the holes should be enlarged. I have only one putter,
and I don't feel that people who spend large amounts of money
for fancy putters should be rewarded. I have noticed that
most of my putts go within one foot of the hole, which should
be close enough to count. Therefore, please enlarge the hole
to have a one-foot radius so that my puts will go in.
3) Third, my sister-in-law has planned a birthday party for her
adopted orphan son, little Billy, that falls on the same day
that you have scheduled the US Open next year. Little Billy
is in the Cub Scouts and already is helping little old ladies
to cross the street. I'm certain that it would not be in
society's best interest to ignore Cub Scouts and the safety of
little old ladies. Please change the date of the US Open to
another weekend so that it fits better with the things I need
to attend to in the rest of my life.
4) Fourth, I am getting older and find that playing 18 holes is
too hard on me. Please reduce the number of holes on all golf
courses to 9. The remainder of the courses could then be used
to grow food to feed the hungry, to build homes on to house
the homeless, and to construct laboratories where researchers
can find cures for cancer and AIDS.
Rarely can adoption of so few suggestions hit such a hole-in-one
for mankind. In a few more years I will be older and may suggest
an even greater reduction in the US Open that, besides permitting
me to win at that time, will be calculated to promote world peace
and harmony.
Fore forever,
Dick Norton Ennsixaa
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