In light of the recent events I thought this would be fitting.
>Subject: Latest Microsoft Press release...
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>REDMOND, Wash. - Oct. 23, 1997 -- In direct response to accusations made
>by the Department of Justice, the Microsoft Corp. announced today that it
>will be acquiring the federal government of the United States of America
>for an undisclosed sum.
>
>"It's actually a logical extension of our planned growth", said
>Microsoft chairman Bill Gates, "It really is going to be a positive
>Arrangement for everyone". Microsoft representatives held a briefing in
>the oval office of the White House with U.S. President Bill Clinton, and
>assured members of the press that changes will be "minimal". The United
>States will be managed as a wholly owned division of Microsoft. An
>initial public offering is planned for July of next year, and the
>federal government is expected to be profitable by "Q4 1999 at latest",
>according to Microsoft president Steve Ballmer.
>
>In a related announcement, Bill Clinton stated that he had "willingly
>and enthusiastically" accepted a position as a vice president with
>Microsoft, and will continue to manage the United States government,
>reporting directly to Bill Gates. When asked how it felt to give up the
>mantle of executive authority to Gates, Clinton smiled and referred to
>it as "a relief". He went on to say that Gates has a "proven track
>record", and that U.S. citizens should offer Gates their "full support
>and confidence". Clinton will reportedly be earning several times the
>$200,000 annually he has earned as U.S. president, in his new role at
>Microsoft.
>
>Gates dismissed a suggestion that the U.S. Capitol be moved to Redmond
>as "silly", though did say that he would make executive decisions for
>the U.S. government from his existing office at Microsoft headquarters.
>Gates went on to say that the House and Senate would "of course" be
>abolished. "Microsoft isn't a democracy", he observed, "and look how
>well we're doing". When asked if the rumored attendant acquisition of
>Canada was proceeding, Gates said, "We don't deny that discussions are
>taking place".
>
>Microsoft representatives closed the conference by stating that United
>States citizens will be able to expect lower taxes, increases in
>government services and discounts on all Microsoft products.
>
>About Microsoft Founded in 1975, Microsoft (NASDAQ "MSFT") is the
>worldwide leader in software for personal computers, and democratic
>government. The company offers a wide range of products and services for
>public, business and personal use, each designed with the mission of
>making it easier and more enjoyable for people to take advantage of the
>full power of personal computing and free society every day. About the
>United States Founded in 1789, the United States of America is the most
>successful nation in the history of the world, and has been a beacon of
>democracy and opportunity for over 200 years. Headquartered in
>Washington, D.C., the United States is a wholly owned subsidiary of
>Microsoft Corporation.
>
73
Mike...NO6X
Check out my home page at http://home.inreach.com/no6x
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