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Topband: In search of the True Monopole, Part Two.

To: TopBand List <>
Subject: Topband: In search of the True Monopole, Part Two.
From: Guy Olinger K2AV <>
Date: Wed, 1 Feb 2012 19:22:11 -0500
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Finding the True Monopole was going to cost time and money, thought
Cackle as he walked back down the steps.

Was he still in his haint dream?

Cackle mindlessly walked straight across the middle yard on one of the
crossing walks and stopped at a sidewalk intersection to look around.
A young student was walking toward him. She noted Cackle's searching
and paused before him.

"Are you looking for something, sir?"

"I suppose I'm looking for building 73."

"Right in front of you." She smiled, pointed, and walked on.

There it was, in plain sight, a "73 - Outservices", black on a white
sign, and if he'd kept walking on without pause, he would have tripped
over it. Cackle walked over and through the door into 73. A pretty
woman who looked as young as the students, was doing something
clerical behind the long counter that divided the room in half.

The door closed behind him and rang a chime somewhere in the office.
After a pause she looked up.

"May I help you?" She spoke brightly, and with a smile.

"I'd like to subscribe to the technical library."

"I'll be here to help you with that on Monday, Wednesday, Friday from
8:30 to noon, or you can go online to and
fill out the form." She again spoke brightly and still with a smile.

"Would it be possible to have that dealt with today? It's only 1 pm. I
have quite a drive home from here, and I would like to spend the
afternoon in the library since I set aside the time to get here. I
don't want to lose the weekend."  Cackle felt a whiney pleading edge
creeping into his voice.

"No sir, quite sorry. We've had budget cuts and we do have procedures.
Those books have been closed for the day." still brightly and with a
smile. "Shall I see you here Monday?"

Cackle let out a breath. "I don't know. Thank you," resolved to remain
polite in spite of growing perturbance."

Cackle turned and walked toward the door, without thought mumbling
under his breath, "Cheshire Cat."

"Wrong dream." retorted the bright voice.

Cackle shuddered involuntarily, surpressing an urge to run, not walk.


Cackle sat in front of his computer, having typed
www.oldulibraryservices.e into the URL line on his browser. His finger
tapped nervously on the "d" key without depressing it. Suddenly he
tapped the key too hard and he was staring at
www.oldulibraryservices.ed on the URL line.

Cackle jerked his hands back like he had been slapped.

I've spent all day, he thought, trying to do some research on the True
Monopole. He sighed out loud. No. I'm trying to research "monopole"
and get the True Definition. No, no, no, get a scientific definition
of a monopole. I'm looking for the proper definition of monopole. He
found himself reliving the dream and Elmer Wills repeating "True
Monopole" over and over again, as if the words were meant to torture.

"What AM I doing?" Cackle spoke aloud, jumping up from the desk. "Why
do I care anything about a monopole. This is all crazy. STUPID DREAM!"

Cackle immediately felt dread and foreboding, as if he had done
something so evil as curse God. He was surely going insane. True

He sat back down and typed "u", then "enter".

The Old U page came up and flashed through some ads on extension
classes, then a drill down menu of services and departments.  Cackle
clicked on "Library". Then on "Community Library Subscriptions".
Briefly a picture flashed of the Technical Library building, and then
a popup page:

To enter data to Library Services pages, please log on. If you do not
have an account, please register.

Cackle's sense of foreboding was returning. He clicked on the
"Register" button. He filled out all the entry fields and clicked the
submit button.  A window popped up telling him he should shortly
receive an email, and please follow the instructions to complete your

In a scant 30 seconds Cackle had a new email in his inbox. It
contained a URL to click to verify that he was the one who had made
the request. Cackle clicked on the link, which brought up a browser.
A little bit of relief began to set in, and then dissipated as the
browser displayed a window. It read:

   Thank You, Cackle Fersus, for registering
   for Old U Library Services. The administrator
   will process your request and set up your
   account where you may arrange for services
   and payment, and use Library online facilities.

   Due to budget cuts, these applications are
   only handled Monday, Wednesday, and Friday
   8:30 AM to 12:00 Noon. Thank you for your
   patience. -- Old U Outservices.

"Handled by the Cheshire Cat," growled Cackle. He was thinking about
his recurring dream where he parks his car somewhere, and it's not
there when he comes back, and he can never find it.


Cackle was sitting up in his bed, dreading going to sleep. "This is
crazy," speaking aloud to no one else in the room. "None of this makes
sense. None of this is worth losing sleep."  Cackle laid back on his
pillow and reached up to turn off his reading light, plunging the room
into darkness.  He fell asleep almost instantly.

Elmer Wills was holding up an Ipad for him to view, displaying a web
page.  Pointing to it Elmer said, "Not a mon-o-pole. Five pole," in
the voice of Jacob Marley.  Cackle was wondering to himself, how did
Elmer get an Ipad?

-- To be continued --


73, Guy.
UR RST IS ... ... ..9 QSB QSB - hw? BK

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