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[RTTY] Parody Island

To: <rtty@contesting.com>
Subject: [RTTY] Parody Island
From: w1mag@bellatlantic.net (Ed Magnuson)
Date: Sun, 31 Mar 2002 10:19:15 -0500
You already have a volunteer for official DXpedition
archivist. But what you also need is a tough, fiercely
independent reporter to expose the true nature of your
operation to a vast expectant public. I qualify since I was
a member of the 1982 DXpedition to Navassa Island and wrote
about it for Time Magazine. I also bravely demonstrated how
a trainee SSB op can frustrate thousands of hysterical
callers.

But I warn you. My aim would be to dig beneath the surface
and find answers to what my readers really want to know. Is
your only mike actually inoperative? Does shouting "599,
thank you, QRZ" constitute meaningful communication? If so,
what is the deeper meaning? Do the thousands of hams barking
goofy phonetics into their mikes truly contribute to global
understanding? Or are they part of a divisive SSB cult? Does
the command "Up! Up! Up!" serve a nobler purpose than the
one I give my dog? "Down! Down! Down!"

I would expect to discover that these SSB rants lead only to
worldwide noise pollution

and that in the high interest of worldwide peace of mind
they must be replaced by the soft soothing clicks of a fast
RTTY keyboard.

Being retired, I can't get Time to publish me any more. But
I retain close contacts at the top of the media world and
know I could get Matt Drudge to run my expose on-line. His
readers
demand the kind of balanced perspective that I could provide
on such an urgent subject as the inherent absurdity of SSB.

Ed, W1MAG







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